A slowness fell over her
No longer willing to press back
The voices, they were real,
She wasn’t imagining it.
Watching her every move.
Gaslighting from within.
No one would have believed it…
Unless they heard it themself.
She wasn’t losing it after all.
They were laying traps.
She no longer cared why.
Time is up!
Sitting here, wind in my sails…gone
An unsettled uneasiness engulfs me
Stress is building, fingers are pointing
nothing feels safe anymore…
Never work, not home, even things that distract…
I need to get lost, go away, be unburdened
Be alone with my thoughts
But I can’t think anymore
If I do, I’ll lose my mind.
Maybe everything coming apart…
Will help to make it all alright.
Begin again.
The sky closes in and the wind picks up
Creaking limbs let go of dead leaves
Falling and sticking to everything below
Pelting droplets find their way
Through the canopy above
Muddied boots sink in softened ground
Eyes up, hoping to rinse away
The dirt and grime of days gone by
Hopeful for the past to be washed clean
Ready for the storm to pass
And to start life again, renewed
Waking, fists clenching sheets
Jaw tight and weary of keeping it in
Mouth on fire, teeth rattle in my head
15 months of constant strife
This is now only a shell of a life.
The goal now met, now what?
Do I return to the status quo?
Shift my position?
Or move to something new?
A clicking jaw, feeling broken,
Ready to be whole once more.
Grinning from ear to ear
But her eyes gave her away
Diving in, another piece of cheese.
Her only solace, was she a mouse?
Cheddar melting on her tongue,
The sharpness makes her feel….
It’s about all that she senses.
Spiraling, watching it happen.
Still not sure what will make it stop.
Make it stop.
Stop!
Sitting here, biting lips,
Trying not to say a word.
Cringing as the future unfolds,
One voice drowned by the din.
They know exactly what they do,
But it’s not what the cheering masses think.
Those who see it know,
We won’t be heard for now,
But we’ll end up cleaning the mess they make.
We can only hope realization isn’t too late.
Clean up on aisle eight!
Barren shelves, white as fresh fallen snow
Waiting for beauty and whimsy to grace thee
Faded family photos set aside to blend in
But inspiration is elusive and out of grasp.
The festive holiday has passed
And a chill has settled in my bones.
Nothing brings in the warmth
Not even this freshly brewed tea
I’ve wrapped my hands around.
Nothing inspires, what a bore….
I’m in desperate need of new decor.
Sitting on a shelf, waiting to be played with;
This is where fragile items go.
On display when the time comes,
Or gathering dust out of sight.
Sadness would show in dimmed eyes
If this were real, if things had feelings,
But instead, gentle smiles plastered on faces
Must be careful with fragile things;
But don’t they know nor understand,
ceramics and crystal grow strong with use.
Don’t save it for another day,
Get it down and enjoy time to together;
After all, we are all but a fleeting glimmer.
Twinkling lights still shimmer
On tired boughs of green;
Delaying farewells to the season,
Let’s keep it up a few more days.
The holidays started late this year
And work caused everything to be rushed;
Just a few more moments of peace
Before the frenzy resumes once more.
Soon the holiday movies will end,
The jolly music will cease,
Decorations will be stored once more.
But for one more night procrastinate,
For one more night find joy in our hearts.
The season’s warm glow fades
The chill sets into our bones
Frivolity will soon cease
Cheer and hope soon will wane
But for now we push forward
A false sense of new beginnings
Just waiting for reality to settle in.
Smiles, toasts, plastered grins.
But we all know,
it will one day end.
(Well…that took a turn!)
Dawn Renee Writes 