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Raw

Yes, I get angry, and I hurt.

I scream, I sulk, I slam things.

I cry.

I pour on the super sweet,

I am trying to keep the peace.

I work hard to let things go.

I retreat into my own world.

The de facto stance of me.

I woke him up this morning,

Not even upset with him,

Just tired of the same ol’ shit.

Dishes piled, left for two days.

He knows to rinse out the damn cups.

But it really wasn’t toward him.

I don’t know why things bother me.

I smile through the moment,

And then, in my solitude, I vent.

Dropping the glass jars into the trash,

Because this hellhole doesn’t recycle,

Rescuing the wood cutting board

Left soaking in water, slamming it down.

I could never hurt a fly,

But there are times my tongue is razor sharp.

After all, no one is perfect.

I try to keep it to just me,

Only those closest see through,

The fake smile, the anxiety,

to the real me.

writing

Swans in the Mist – Part Two

Reposted from April, 2021 – Refresher for Part Three


Charlotte startled herself awake. She rubbed her eyes and looked around. Nothing looked familiar. The walls were made of wood logs. The crackling fire in front of her looked unreal, no wood, no flame, just warmth, a glowing light and a tinny sound.

She sat up and realized her clothes had been changed. Some sort of odd tartan patterned button down in what looked like a dressing gown.

“Oh good. You’re awake!” a sweet voice spoke to her from behind. She was startled to hear another person’s voice, full of a strange drawl. “Henry, she’s awake!” she called out. “Here dear, have some tea. I’m Sarah,” she stated as she sat in the neighboring chair, handing her a cuppa with cream and sugar.

Charlotte took a sip. The tea was way stronger than she was used to. “Wow, what type of tea is this? How did I get here? Where are my clothes?”

Sarah smiled and understood her confusion. Charlotte wasn’t the first visitor they had entertained. “First, dear, what is your name? Then I’ll answer all the questions I can.”

“My name is Charlotte. Now, answer my questions please!” Charlotte looked down, then felt her left thigh. Sarah saw her reach for her dagger.

“Hi Charlotte. My name is Sarah. Don’t worry first of all. Your dagger is safely stored, for all of our safety. I found it when I unraveled your tattered dress from your legs. The fabric was wrapped around your leg quite tight and we were concerned it would harm you. Unfortunately, your skirt will not be salvagable. Your blouse and bloomers are in the wash.” Sarah drew out the word wash, it sounded more like warsh. “Don’t worry, Henry turned around. He didn’t see anything. We girls need to stick together.”

Charlotte was apprehensive, but Sarah seemed genuine. Sarah was dressed simply, some sort of soft clothed shirt and dungarees, nothing Charlotte had ever seen a woman wear. Sarah seemed to be in her forties, grey streaks ran through her dark curly and short hair.

“As for the tea, it is a Chai Latte with vanilla. Do you like it?”

Charlotte smiled, “It is more flavorful than what I normally drink.”

Sarah flashed a knowing smile. “And, to how you got here…we are not sure. We found you out by Cygnet Lake. You were passed out on the bench and looked to be in rough shape. We brought you home to help.”

“Home? My family owns the land in this area, acres of it. Are you one of our neighbors?” Charlotte grew confused.

Sarah smiled faintly. She hated this part of discussions with their visitors. She needed backup to help Charlotte understand. “Henry, could you join me please?”

The clunk of boots came down the hall. Six-foot three Henry entered the room. Charlotte stood and turned to greet him. In front of her stood a handsome man in his forties with short graying hair with her father’s face.

writing

Swans in the Mist – Part Two

Charlotte startled herself awake. She rubbed her eyes and looked around. Nothing looked familiar. The walls were made of wood logs. The crackling fire in front of her looked unreal, no wood, no flame, just warmth, a glowing light and a tinny sound.

She sat up and realized her clothes had been changed. Some sort of odd tartan patterned button down in what looked like a dressing gown.

“Oh good. You’re awake!” a sweet voice spoke to her from behind. She was startled to hear another person’s voice, full of a strange drawl. “Henry, she’s awake!” she called out. “Here dear, have some tea. I’m Sarah,” she stated as she sat in the neighboring chair, handing her a cuppa with cream and sugar.

Charlotte took a sip. The tea was way stronger than she was used to. “Wow, what type of tea is this? How did I get here? Where are my clothes?”

Sarah smiled and understood her confusion. Charlotte wasn’t the first visitor they had entertained. “First, dear, what is your name? Then I’ll answer all the questions I can.”

“My name is Charlotte. Now, answer my questions please!” Charlotte looked down, then felt her left thigh. Sarah saw her reach for her dagger.

“Hi Charlotte. My name is Sarah. Don’t worry first of all. Your dagger is safely stored, for all of our safety. I found it when I unraveled your tattered dress from your legs. The fabric was wrapped around your leg quite tight and we were concerned it would harm you. Unfortunately, your skirt will not be salvagable. Your blouse and bloomers are in the wash.” Sarah drew out the word wash, it sounded more like warsh. “Don’t worry, Henry turned around. He didn’t see anything. We girls need to stick together.”

Charlotte was apprehensive, but Sarah seemed genuine. Sarah was dressed simply, some sort of soft clothed shirt and dungarees, nothing Charlotte had ever seen a woman wear. Sarah seemed to be in her forties, grey streaks ran through her dark curly and short hair.

“As for the tea, it is a Chai Latte with vanilla. Do you like it?”

Charlotte smiled, “It is more flavorful than what I normally drink.”

Sarah flashed a knowing smile. “And, to how you got here…we are not sure. We found you out by Cygnet Lake. You were passed out on the bench and looked to be in rough shape. We brought you home to help.”

“Home? My family owns the land in this area, acres of it. Are you one of our neighbors?” Charlotte grew confused.

Sarah smiled faintly. She hated this part of discussions with their visitors. She needed backup to help Charlotte understand. “Henry, could you join me please?”

The clunk of boots came down the hall. Six-foot three Henry entered the room. Charlotte stood and turned to greet him. In front of her stood a handsome man in his forties with short graying hair with her father’s face.

poetry, writing

The Old Man in the Tree

He slumbers all day, deep inside his tree.

As the sun sets, he opens his eyes to watch as people stroll by.

Most do not see him, and this makes him sad.

How can you just walk by without saying “Hi!” he wonders to himself.

But innocent children and creative minds will stop and smile.

When they do, he reveals himself in a most beautiful way.

A shudder of leaves and a joyful smile grows across his face, for he knows he is appreciated.

writing

Take a Hike – Part Three

Saturday had a chilly start. Bundled in a fleece jacket and warm lycra pants, she hunted down her camera in the predawn light. Slowly, the dark skies gave way to the distant glow of the sun.

She donned her sandals and stepped out of the tent. The field behind her was filled with white blossoms which had bloomed overnight. Hundreds upon hundreds of these flowers showed off their beauty in the early morning hours.

She wandered aside the field then over to the water for some sunrise photos over Florida Bay. The sun slowly peaked out through distance clouds as it rose above the keys out towards the east.

She headed back to the tent and was greeted with a hot tea, freshly brewed. Her partner had his coffee in hand. They took a seat on their tent’s porch and enjoyed the view of the water.

The temperature remained in the mid 70s during the day, perfect for a hike on the Snake Bight Trail. The trail was straight and long. It went from heavy shade to shady, to almost no shade in the final third of the trail.

Birds chirped, but stayed well hidden in the trees. No other wildlife was seen during their hike. Bromeliads and orchids dotted the tree limbs. Some had spiked flowers of oranges and reds, some even were purple.

As the trail approached its end, the trees turned grey and no leaves were to be found. They found themselves in a driftwood forest, barren except for the occasional ibis hiding in the tree. A small boardwalk led them over the stream which the trail had followed, allowing them to see out over Snake Bight. A bight is a small inward curve of the coastline.

Herons, egrets, and ibis made their rounds in the distance, fishing for their food. They stopped for a few minutes to get some snacks and water, then enjoyed the scenery before making the trek back inland.

The sun and exercise had zapped most of her energy. When they arrived back to the tent, she found her way to the bed, enjoying the cool breeze rushing through the tent. Quickly, she drifted off to a well-earned nap.

writing

Take a Hike – Part Two

The drive to the Everglades seemed to be never ending. The spine of Florida is long and covered with citrus groves, ranches, and small to medium sized towns filled with the standard fast food joints.

Finally, the road led her and her travel mate to the entrance of the Everglades National Park. The air seemed to change the moment she passed through the gates. Trees, open spaces, grass covered lands surrounded her. A wave of calm settled in.

The eco-tents at Flamingo Campgrounds are 34 miles from the gate. After a leisurely drive, they checked in and were assigned Tent 14. She made her way down the raised boardwalk with her traveling partner. The tent faced directly south overlooking Florida Bay. A field of grasses and other low growth bordered the little tent city.

To the east and the west, campers and backpackers were also set up. It wasn’t overly crowded even though it was prime spring break season.

They settled into the tent for the evening. As night fell, the temperature dropped to a mere 58 degrees, cold to a Florida girl. She found her fleece jacket and bundled up, adding a blanket to the bed as they headed to bed.

The winds picked up and the tent’s rain fly shuddered and slapped against the metal structure. Certainly, there were clouds in the sky and a storm on the way. Lightning flashed through the open screens facing the water.

At four in the morning, she awoke, startled. Mother Nature was calling, but she contemplated holding off. It was no use. She found her sandals and slipped out into the night.

She looked around as she stepped out of the tent to discover not a cloud in the sky. Surprisingly, the moon had set and thousands of stars shown overhead. She looked up in awe as she walked the winding boardwalk to the restroom.

On her way back, the cold air still struck her, but she couldn’t take her eyes off the sky. She hadn’t seen the stars like this in ages. She let out a gentle sigh, grateful for this chance to get away, then made her way back to bed, serene and peaceful.

writing

Coastal Calamity – Part One

Yarl Riku pounded his staff onto the hard coral mound, commanding the attention of the Guard. It was not often he wielded his power, but for now, it became necessary.

“Guard, we need your vigilance and your protection at this desperate time. I require eight volunteers, four to protect the royal family, and four to accompany me on a mission to Terra.”

A low murmur could be heard from the Guard. It was a rare event for the Yarl to interact with Terrans, especially given their short history on the planet.

“The rest of you will have increased patrol duties until this crisis can be resolved.”

Jon floated forward, “I volunteer for either assignment, sir.”

Riku nodded at Jon, his oldest friend. “You shall accompany me, Jon. Others?”

Soon, three others floated forward. “Sam, Rob, and Tim, thank you. I need four more…”

Diana and three additional mermaids floated forward, volunteering.

Riku paused. They were well skilled, but he did not believe any of the maids would step forward. He knew his next action could set the tone for years to come.

“Thank you! Diana, you, and Mikala will join Jon and Tim on our journey to Terra. The other two will serve as additional guards for the Royal family with Sam and Rob.”

“The rest of you will receive your assignments shortly. Dismissed.”

Jon floated up next to Riku. “Sir, should we call in any others to be protected at the Seamount?” He gave Riku a knowing smile.

“No, it will not be necessary. Morgen will accompany us to Terra. Her presence is vital to the success of our mission.”

Jon nodded his head, but was surprised by the direction. Riku often protected her more, although she had always been capable.

Riku turned to all of the volunteers. “Take care of any open affairs today and meet up at the Seamount at first light.”

With that, everyone dispersed. Riku headed to Morgen’s to solicit her to accompany him to Terra. She would not deny the Yarl’s request, but he hoped she would welcome it.

poetry, writing

Wonder in the Stars

I look up and see the stars shining bright.

The moon rises as do my spirits.

Knowing you are here in this world,

Sometimes this is enough

to settle my soul and make me smile.

As long as we are both here, there is a chance

We won’t have to wait until next time.

I wonder if you ever think the same.

About Me, writing

Write A Book!?

A voice boomed inside my head several years ago. Write a book!

Of course this voice came to me in the bathroom of all places….greatest source of ideas for thinkers, aside from dreams and long quiet walks, that is!

I ignored it. I write for a living…mundane and boring and precise writing mind you. But not for entertainment…well, at least not for a long time. What I have written could fill volumes…. Specifications and requirements to capture the visions of others and make them understandable for the magicians behind the code.

Why would I write….a book?! I kept pushing that voice aside. Not now. Not ever. Not, well, maybe.

I am still trying to figure it out. I haven’t written any books yet. But I started this site to push myself to find what I’d enjoy writing about. I hope you, the reader, are enjoying the journey with me. Some fantasy, some fiction, some travel, some things just out of this crazy head of mine!

I also returned to a long lost interest in reading too…I was recently engrossed in a series called Echo (https://dirtyscifibuddha.com/ aka Kent Wayne – Thanks for the trip!) If you like military fighting, mixed with mysticism, mixed with self discovery, check it out.

So, I’ll let you know if, no, when, I write that book. Sometimes we have to listen to that voice in our head, that beat in our heart, that tingle in our gut, to find the right direction.

At least now, I’m listening.